Jalal Al-Ahmed
- Details
- Hits: 4960
Jalal Al-Ahmed
An author and expert in sociology and a contemporary researcher he was born in Denieh in the year 1923. He finished his primary and secondary studies in Tehran, and then he resumed his higher studies in faculty of arts in Tehran University in the year 1946.
Jalal Al-Ahmed embarked upon his social activities with a political motivation, but later he refrained from joining any party and groups, so he dedicated himself to researches, studies, translation and writing. Most important of his works of literature are the following:
Translating “contaminated hands” for Jan Paul Sartre, editing five articles, a voyage to the land of the angel of death, visiting, headmaster of the school, expatriation, Kharj island, the gambler, rhinoceros, at the service of the enlightened individuals and their treason and finally a straw in the rendezvous (Miqat).
In the year 1964 Jalal Al-Ahmed had the owner in visiting the holy mosque in Mecca. The outcome of that visit was wrote in a book titled “a straw in the Miqat”, he explained in that book daily events of that blessed visit, we shall quote some excerpts of it.
A straw in the Miqat:
Friday the tenth of April 1964, we left Tehran international Airport heading for Jeddah city in Saudi Arabia; we arrived there at eight and half local time. Our group’s members were eighty five individuals, as follows:
Twenty individuals from common people, fifteen persons from Mazandran province, five or six persons Alawi (Sayed), ten villagers from those villages surrounding Arak city in Iran spoke Turkish only, twenty ladies, myself and my sister accompanied by her husband Jawad, in addition to one of my sisters’ husband and my father’s uncle, while the head of the group was a person from our quarter accompanied by his son and a chef with his aid.
Saturday, the eleventh of April 1964, Medina
We entered Medina at eight and half in the morning, how many porters in Jeddah city! And how many beggars in the way between Jeddah and Medina!!
It seemed that our trip wasn’t per-organized; the officials there empowered the weakest and less educated individuals in the society to take care of Hajj and pilgrims! Now, we are about midday and we know nothing about the whereabouts of our companions in the group, the head of the group said that the Saudis officials wouldn’t allow any caravan to move after nine o’clock in the morning due to the heat of the sun, caravans must wait till sunset, it is another typical organization! Of course they were worried about the possibility of the vehicles getting over-heated and the loss that the transportation company might bear!
Night in the Prophetical mosque:
After performing Night Prayers I walked in that area, under the portico of the mosque there were preachers, some of them were talking about the virtues of the Prophet (pbuh) in an eloquent language, and others talking in pyre Arabic something much nearer to cock-and-bull stories of separation from one’s homeland, with an Indian streak. I was surprised for a preacher to cast empty subjects in Prophet’s city that public won’t do!
But at the same time that preacher was talking about faith and Islam and its consequences on the West world if both of them were united!! He was aware of bad and good and would explain that for his audiences.
Sunday, twelfth of April 1964, Medina
Eid’s day would be determined tonight, it would be announced whether new moon was seen or not! Officials asked the public to notify the head of the lawful court if anyone was able to see the new moon at that particular night!
This morning I felt that I’m ok and in good mood to say hello to everybody and to perform my prayers without hypocrisy! I didn’t believe that I’m performing a religious duty like other visitors! I remembered all prayers and Koranic chapters and verses that I memorized during my childhood! The only difficulty was that I found Arabic expressions a little bit difficult to pronounce, you can’t ignore them and find another way to solve that problem. This morning I realized how difficult those expressions were!
In the morning I was so proud to say: O Prophet! God bless you!! The holy shrine was near to mw and visitors were striving to kiss it, while that was painful to policemen to observe a sin being committed! They tried hard to stop it, but for me, and while I was in that condition, I cried and left the holy shrine in hurry!
Monday, the thirteenth of April 1964, Medina
After sunrise, I went to Bakea cemetery; I was searching for Prophetical Sunna in the sands, and prior to anything else, to my brother, but there was no trace or mark for his grave there, when there are no traces or marks for four Shies’ Imams graves and the graves of Ottoman and Prophet’s wives, who would be my brother?
The cemetery is consisting of soft sand hills, including small pieces of protrusive black stones here and there, those Wahabis who came to power forty years ago, did they do that because of sheer fanaticism?
Every grave had a dome and a small building in the past; I haven’t seen such justice and equality before! Anybody perceives those meanings and expressions would realize the importance of setting up a memorial in lieu of the graves of those distinctive figures at the center of Bakea cemetery bears their names, their birthdays and the days of their demise!
No doubt that Saudis are not capable of administering these holy sites, Mecca and Medina must be taken out of their control and turned to two international Islamic cities!
While I was thinking of that matter, I remembered how my deceased brother managed in not only surrounding Imams’ graves with stones but to photo them as well! His death was a surprise for us once we heard about it in Tehran!
Tuesday, the fourteenth of April 1964, Medina
Only Iranian visitors are bound to travel to Hijaz by air, therefore they are not supposed to return home via Iraq! In the morning I went to Ohod area in a good mood, this area is considered the summer resort for Medina inhabitants, it has plenty of water and a populated area, then I returned to Prophet’s mosque, usually I enter the holy mosque from Al-Salaam door due to its wideness and easiness for entering and leaving the mosque. I circumambulated around the holy shrine of the Prophet (pbuh) which was free from congestion at that time waiting for prayer time.
Wednesday the fifteenth of April 1964, Medina
It was confirmed that Saudis announced that Monday was the first of the lunar month "Dhu Al-Hijjah", so coming Wednesday shall be the day of Eid (Grand Bairum), with one day difference between Sunni brothers and Shies, how many researches and tittle-tattle were created due to this matter!
Everybody has to believe this matter and oblige to it, there is no other option, and no one dares to act individually in Hajj! It seems that we have to move towards Mecca coming Friday in Ihram garment.
Thursday, the sixteenth of April 1964, Medina
We moved at six and thirty minutes in the morning, in our way in Al-Ainiah street we passed by a negro, he seemed African citizen, had displayed a hill of shabby clothes for sale! He was shouting inviting passers by to purchase them! Then we passed by a market where fresh clover was displayed near the Egyptian door, suddenly I saw a boy riding a bicycle, and I asked him:
Is this the way to Fattah mosque? He said: Yes! And went!
Al-Fattah mosque is located on a hill close to a ravine that Selman the Persian dug a trench near it. Descending waters from Ohod Mountain are turning around Selaa Mountain then towards West of Medina. Near that ravine there are some historic mosques such as: Fattah, Selman, Abu Baker, Omar, Ali (pbuh) and Al-Zahra (pbuh), Abu Baker’s mosque is the biggest one and has three doors and a hall.
At the afternoon of that day I went to gardens surrounding “Babb- Al-Awaly” to the East of Medina and south of Bakea cemetery, and then I had to think of sadness of sunset! For the first time I faced the low spirit of alienation and asked my self: Why did I make this trip? Was it for praying, Or worshipping? Or was it for tourism, or discovery?
I returned to Medina and joined the lines of worshippers!
Friday, the seventeenth of April 1964
We are still in Medina, today I suffered from severe thirst, even cold water and cubes of ice couldn’t quench my thirst, so I resorted to diet in my food, and I drank orange juice and other fruits!
My sister warned me of ruining my stomach. The head of our group approached me, and I told him: enough is enough! You must stop walking; tonight we got to move towards Mecca in uncovered vehicles and wearing Ihram garments, we have to cross four hundred kilometers. They are loading the vehicles from this moment; everybody is waiting near the vehicles!
Saturday, the eighteenth of April 1964, Mecca
At four and thirty minutes we were in Mecca, last night at eight and thirty minutes we moved from Medina, we stopped at “Rabigh”, and the outset of our journey we stopped at “Halfah” mosque for putting on Ihram garment.
We moved under the sky while I was awake, what a night it was! I couldn’t close my eyes, I read all poems I memorized in my life till dawn, I discovered that myself was a straw in Miqat (rendezvous)! Then I knew it was the time for perpetuity or time’s ocean!
Miqat could be at any time, and any place, I discovered that it could be with self only! Eventually I discovered that traveling is another mean to find out the self!
The same day in the holy mosque:
It seems that after a year holy Kaaba shall be built with concrete, the same as the Prophet mosque in Medina. The endeavor (Al-Saai) between Safa and Marwa was transformed to a two-story corridor of pure cement; officials are doing their best in order to demolish that open gallery from Ottoman era.
The courtyard of the holy mosque where visitors circumambulate is covered with marble.
The same Saturday, Mecca
How strenuous was endeavor (Al-Saai) between Safa and Marwa! It would take you to 1400 years back! Or to 10000 years back!! Running and falling down under visitors’ feet, while wheelchairs are moving and people assume self-renunciation! Would this great gathering mean that a single individual loses himself among the crowd? This crowd might consist of 10000 or 20000 individuals doing the same job at one time!
Do you can be your self in this great self-renunciation and perform your duty alone?
The pressure and struggling from everybody shall force you to go to the direction that the crowd wants you to be! All calculations here shall be lost! There would be no meaning for individualism! What is the difference between 2000 and 10000? Yemenis are there with their dirtiness and unkempt hair and hollow eyes and the ropes tightened to their wastes!
Negroes are different; some of them tall while others are well-built bodies!
They move with all their bodies and wouldn’t care of other visitors, ladies are moving here and there holding their slippers as if they have been lost in the desert! It seems they are not human beings to attend Hajj rituals, at the time when everybody was ready to help them. Here is a vivid youth pushing everybody in his way and paving the way for himself and laughing as if he is in a crowded market!
Another old man is being pushed by the crowd and being forced to move to the front. I was convinced that I wouldn’t tolerate seeing his body under the crowd’s feet! I extended my hand to him and asked him to sit and relax in the endeavor (Al-Saai), to be in safe from visitors in their endeavor between Safa and Marwa. At the end of that chaos you shall find self-renunciation at Marwa which is higher than the corridor, you must turn around and return to the place you came from.
Whenever Yemenis reach the end of endeavor (Al-Saai) they jump and turn around then they point at the holy Kaaba, then they repeat the attempt, there I discovered my weakness and cried then I decided to ran away!
During circumambulation around the holy Kaaba, you rotate shoulder to shoulder with other visitors, you start from a specified point then you come to that point at the end! Which means there are order and target existing!!
You are an atom rotating around the center, so you are connected and tied to something, you are not free! The most important thing there is that there would be no confrontation, you rotate shoulder to shoulder, in Al-Saai (endeavor) you start and return to the point you have started with! The same as Hajar, mother of Ishmael (pbuh) did, she didn’t have a specified target.
What you would face is the continuation of confronting different eyes!
A pilgrim who endeavors is equivalent to two feet running! And a pair of eyes that don’t see anything but running away for themselves!
There are no eyes there except dissolute consciences, or consciences sitting at the threshold of eyes waiting orders to run away! Do you think you would be able to look at those eyes even for a second? Up to that day I thought I wouldn’t be able to look at the sun only! But today I discovered the difficulty in looking to the sea of these eyes also!! So I run away after two rounds in Al-Saai (endeavor).
Simply, you discover that you are a zero that is being used in adding to infinity! This phenomenon occurs when you are optimistic, so you feel that you have just started! Otherwise you shall find yourself before that end less than a zero! Either you shall look like a straw on sea’s water, or in a sea of human beings or more than that in the air!
Frankly, I found myself getting crazy to the extent that I wanted to hit my head at the first pillar made of cement; you must be blind if you decided to perform Al-Saai (endeavor)!
When you leave Al-Saai you shall find a market connected to that place, I hid myself behind Al-Saai’s wall in order to quench my thirst by a bottle of coca cola; while I was there I kept thinking of something I read for a western writer about “adding” and “individualism”.
Sunday, the ninetieth of April 1964, Mecca
This morning I went to visit Abu Taleb’s grave; it is located above Amer’s mountain pass, at the stretch of the new cemetery in Mecca, there was no trace for that northern valley! What a surprise, Saudis have destroyed every thing without keeping any trace of them!! There, at the other side, there is Bakea cemetery, here and there; there are some pieces of graved marble, you can recognize neither a place nor anything else!!!
Monday, twentieth of April 1964, Mecca
We suppose to go to Arafat at six or seven o’clock. From this moment an active movement erupted in the room, everybody was in hurry; everyone was tiding ropes and then untying it, which caused some pilgrims to forget how to put on Ihram garment!
Tuesday, the twenty one of April 1964
Arafat is a plain small desert surrounded by mountains from three sides, it is located on Taef road, the area is a little higher than its surroundings and its weather is colder than near areas. From early morning pilgrims resorted to offering their sacrifices, most of Bedouins and Yemenis hang torn-off limps beside their tents either to flay them or to emptying their intestinal.
Wednesday, the twenty second of April 1964
Yesterday afternoon visitors started heading for Mina on feet, last night was the most difficult part of Hajj journey, from nine till ten and thirty o’clock we were walking under severe cold weather and rough ground while we were wearing Ihram garment, ladies remained in the buses, where men went to the versant of the mountain to collect pebbles. Our colleagues collected pebbles in the darkness using torches, preparing themselves to throw at Satan next morning.
At last moments of that dark night it wasn’t cold weather or tiredness or even coughing that annoyed me, but it was the shine of one year and its attraction that would force me to think deeply at such a night till dawn, exactly as that old lady who wiped in front her house’s door for forty days waiting for Prophet Khither (pbuh), but she couldn’t recognize him!
She didn’t recognize Khither at the last day, at that moment I was so exhausted from cold weather and insomnia that I didn’t want to stand in order to look in my inside where the friend and the alien united!
Boundaries are not specified, and interference of that narrow straight which dubbed “Masher Al-Hiram” with the humanity and bestial feelings!
While I was lying on my back I was asking myself: wasn’t that invitation for this reason in particular? Didn’t I accept the invitation for that purpose??
So what is the meaning of self-renunciation then???
The same day at the same location
We left Masher Al-Hiram at five o’clock in the morning; we crossed two kilometers only when the road was blocked! It took from us two hours to cross two kilometers only!! We had to pass a narrow straight while everyone was in hurry. I disembarked from the truck; I knew the location of Shies pilgrims’ tents.
As far as Mina is concerned, it is a valley surrounded by several mountains and at the center of it there is a ravine which branches reach near valleys. And there are simple buildings and shops on the both sides of the road in addition to Khaif mosque. At the end of the valley there is a narrow straight leads to Mecca.
Behind the buildings on both sides of the road, there is an especial place designated for pilgrims’ tents. The first Satan was near police station, the place was so crowded with tall and short individuals, and a hill of pebbles which were thrown at Satan! As for slaughterhouse, it is a vast area surrounded by a fence and has two doors, its ground is totally covered by animals’ corpses, such as sheep, goats and camels, but you wouldn’t see camels among them!
Next Friday, Mecca
Once more we prepared ourselves for moving from Mina to Mecca, the distance between two places is not far but due to road closure it takes some hours to reach Mecca, going to Mina and Arafat and returning from there is a splendid movement, I wish it would be done without vehicles, officials must designate a specified time at the end of afternoon to mobilize all visitors on foot, in this way weak and sick people could be sent in vehicles. That distance could be crossed on foot, vehicles should be omitted from this religious path, and this target could be achieved through transforming the two holy cities in to two international cities!
Saturday, the twenty fifth of April 1964
After our arrival yesterday afternoon, I took a shower and headed for the holy mosque in Mecca, I performed circumambulation (Tawaf) and its prayer, then I performed endeavor between Safa and Marwa, for a while I sat down in the holy mosque watching visitors while they were circumambulating around holy Kaaba and how they were too close to each other and everybody is worried about others!
Sunday, the twenty six of April 1964, Mecca
Still no news regarding departure! Though we accomplished Hajj rituals we had to wait for Saudi government’s permission to leave. According to last years procedures, Egyptian pilgrims would be the first group to obtain leave permission, I couldn’t trace the Egyptians; it seems for me that we would stay here till Eid of Ghadier.
Tuesday, the twenty eight of April 1964, Mecca
We were notified to move at 02 A.M.
Wednesday, the twenty nine of April 1964, Mecca
This afternoon I went for the last time to visit the holy mosque, a visit? No! Not for farewell! Saying farewell to almighty God or his house?
Thursday, the thirteen of April 1964, Jeddah city
We were prepared to travel to Jeddah city from ten o’clock last night, but we moved at 01:45 A.M in order to cross a distance not more than thirty six miles, we arrived at Jeddah airport at 04:30 A.M. here we are at a courtyard in front of the airport, we covered the ground with blankets at our disposal near our bags as thousands of pilgrims did, waiting for take off.
Two o’clock afternoon from the same day
Jeddah city
Those last hours are the worse ones! At 06:15 P.M we handed over our bags to the custom and we are still waiting!
At 10:15 P.M we were at the stairs of the plane. 11P.M, we were inside the plane, it was a B.U.B plane with for engines.
What I learned from this trip that it was out of curiosity not hope! Any way it was an experience and a little adventure! All these simple experiences without adventures, even though they are normal experiences, but they are the essential foundation for a kind of awareness! But awareness is at least a kind of suspicion!!
Therefore, I’m breaking up stairs of certainty due to the pressure of continued experiences, one by one!
By the way, what would be the outcome of life? I remembered later what
“Bolnizar” wrote in his book “the Saudi’s Eden” that a human being is not a pair of eyes only! It became clear for me that a human being is a blend of a environmental and cultural factors, with limited qualities and limited occasions also! What so ever the case is, a human being is not a mirror only, but a mirror that some specified things reflex in it!!
Hajj voyage is a Sunna (religious tradition) that invites a million individual every year to gather in an especial place and encourages them to perform specified rituals, therefore we must stop at the differences and variables since the time of Nasser Khosrow till our present day!
My last word, would that be a confession, an objection or atheism or whatever you like to call it and accept it?
The more thing I was looking for in that trip was the whereabouts of my brother’s grave, and other brothers in faith, God is always available and handy for those who believe in him!!!
Translating “contaminated hands” for Jan Paul Sartre, editing five articles, a voyage to the land of the angel of death, visiting, headmaster of the school, expatriation, Kharj island, the gambler, rhinoceros, at the service of the enlightened individuals and their treason and finally a straw in the rendezvous (Miqat).
In the year 1964 Jalal Al-Ahmed had the owner in visiting the holy mosque in Mecca. The outcome of that visit was wrote in a book titled “a straw in the Miqat”, he explained in that book daily events of that blessed visit, we shall quote some excerpts of it.
A straw in the Miqat:
Friday the tenth of April 1964, we left Tehran international Airport heading for Jeddah city in Saudi Arabia; we arrived there at eight and half local time. Our group’s members were eighty five individuals, as follows:
Twenty individuals from common people, fifteen persons from Mazandran province, five or six persons Alawi (Sayed), ten villagers from those villages surrounding Arak city in Iran spoke Turkish only, twenty ladies, myself and my sister accompanied by her husband Jawad, in addition to one of my sisters’ husband and my father’s uncle, while the head of the group was a person from our quarter accompanied by his son and a chef with his aid.
Saturday, the eleventh of April 1964, Medina
We entered Medina at eight and half in the morning, how many porters in Jeddah city! And how many beggars in the way between Jeddah and Medina!!
It seemed that our trip wasn’t per-organized; the officials there empowered the weakest and less educated individuals in the society to take care of Hajj and pilgrims! Now, we are about midday and we know nothing about the whereabouts of our companions in the group, the head of the group said that the Saudis officials wouldn’t allow any caravan to move after nine o’clock in the morning due to the heat of the sun, caravans must wait till sunset, it is another typical organization! Of course they were worried about the possibility of the vehicles getting over-heated and the loss that the transportation company might bear!
Night in the Prophetical mosque:
After performing Night Prayers I walked in that area, under the portico of the mosque there were preachers, some of them were talking about the virtues of the Prophet (pbuh) in an eloquent language, and others talking in pyre Arabic something much nearer to cock-and-bull stories of separation from one’s homeland, with an Indian streak. I was surprised for a preacher to cast empty subjects in Prophet’s city that public won’t do!
But at the same time that preacher was talking about faith and Islam and its consequences on the West world if both of them were united!! He was aware of bad and good and would explain that for his audiences.
Sunday, twelfth of April 1964, Medina
Eid’s day would be determined tonight, it would be announced whether new moon was seen or not! Officials asked the public to notify the head of the lawful court if anyone was able to see the new moon at that particular night!
This morning I felt that I’m ok and in good mood to say hello to everybody and to perform my prayers without hypocrisy! I didn’t believe that I’m performing a religious duty like other visitors! I remembered all prayers and Koranic chapters and verses that I memorized during my childhood! The only difficulty was that I found Arabic expressions a little bit difficult to pronounce, you can’t ignore them and find another way to solve that problem. This morning I realized how difficult those expressions were!
In the morning I was so proud to say: O Prophet! God bless you!! The holy shrine was near to mw and visitors were striving to kiss it, while that was painful to policemen to observe a sin being committed! They tried hard to stop it, but for me, and while I was in that condition, I cried and left the holy shrine in hurry!
Monday, the thirteenth of April 1964, Medina
After sunrise, I went to Bakea cemetery; I was searching for Prophetical Sunna in the sands, and prior to anything else, to my brother, but there was no trace or mark for his grave there, when there are no traces or marks for four Shies’ Imams graves and the graves of Ottoman and Prophet’s wives, who would be my brother?
The cemetery is consisting of soft sand hills, including small pieces of protrusive black stones here and there, those Wahabis who came to power forty years ago, did they do that because of sheer fanaticism?
Every grave had a dome and a small building in the past; I haven’t seen such justice and equality before! Anybody perceives those meanings and expressions would realize the importance of setting up a memorial in lieu of the graves of those distinctive figures at the center of Bakea cemetery bears their names, their birthdays and the days of their demise!
No doubt that Saudis are not capable of administering these holy sites, Mecca and Medina must be taken out of their control and turned to two international Islamic cities!
While I was thinking of that matter, I remembered how my deceased brother managed in not only surrounding Imams’ graves with stones but to photo them as well! His death was a surprise for us once we heard about it in Tehran!
Tuesday, the fourteenth of April 1964, Medina
Only Iranian visitors are bound to travel to Hijaz by air, therefore they are not supposed to return home via Iraq! In the morning I went to Ohod area in a good mood, this area is considered the summer resort for Medina inhabitants, it has plenty of water and a populated area, then I returned to Prophet’s mosque, usually I enter the holy mosque from Al-Salaam door due to its wideness and easiness for entering and leaving the mosque. I circumambulated around the holy shrine of the Prophet (pbuh) which was free from congestion at that time waiting for prayer time.
Wednesday the fifteenth of April 1964, Medina
It was confirmed that Saudis announced that Monday was the first of the lunar month "Dhu Al-Hijjah", so coming Wednesday shall be the day of Eid (Grand Bairum), with one day difference between Sunni brothers and Shies, how many researches and tittle-tattle were created due to this matter!
Everybody has to believe this matter and oblige to it, there is no other option, and no one dares to act individually in Hajj! It seems that we have to move towards Mecca coming Friday in Ihram garment.
Thursday, the sixteenth of April 1964, Medina
We moved at six and thirty minutes in the morning, in our way in Al-Ainiah street we passed by a negro, he seemed African citizen, had displayed a hill of shabby clothes for sale! He was shouting inviting passers by to purchase them! Then we passed by a market where fresh clover was displayed near the Egyptian door, suddenly I saw a boy riding a bicycle, and I asked him:
Is this the way to Fattah mosque? He said: Yes! And went!
Al-Fattah mosque is located on a hill close to a ravine that Selman the Persian dug a trench near it. Descending waters from Ohod Mountain are turning around Selaa Mountain then towards West of Medina. Near that ravine there are some historic mosques such as: Fattah, Selman, Abu Baker, Omar, Ali (pbuh) and Al-Zahra (pbuh), Abu Baker’s mosque is the biggest one and has three doors and a hall.
At the afternoon of that day I went to gardens surrounding “Babb- Al-Awaly” to the East of Medina and south of Bakea cemetery, and then I had to think of sadness of sunset! For the first time I faced the low spirit of alienation and asked my self: Why did I make this trip? Was it for praying, Or worshipping? Or was it for tourism, or discovery?
I returned to Medina and joined the lines of worshippers!
Friday, the seventeenth of April 1964
We are still in Medina, today I suffered from severe thirst, even cold water and cubes of ice couldn’t quench my thirst, so I resorted to diet in my food, and I drank orange juice and other fruits!
My sister warned me of ruining my stomach. The head of our group approached me, and I told him: enough is enough! You must stop walking; tonight we got to move towards Mecca in uncovered vehicles and wearing Ihram garments, we have to cross four hundred kilometers. They are loading the vehicles from this moment; everybody is waiting near the vehicles!
Saturday, the eighteenth of April 1964, Mecca
At four and thirty minutes we were in Mecca, last night at eight and thirty minutes we moved from Medina, we stopped at “Rabigh”, and the outset of our journey we stopped at “Halfah” mosque for putting on Ihram garment.
We moved under the sky while I was awake, what a night it was! I couldn’t close my eyes, I read all poems I memorized in my life till dawn, I discovered that myself was a straw in Miqat (rendezvous)! Then I knew it was the time for perpetuity or time’s ocean!
Miqat could be at any time, and any place, I discovered that it could be with self only! Eventually I discovered that traveling is another mean to find out the self!
The same day in the holy mosque:
It seems that after a year holy Kaaba shall be built with concrete, the same as the Prophet mosque in Medina. The endeavor (Al-Saai) between Safa and Marwa was transformed to a two-story corridor of pure cement; officials are doing their best in order to demolish that open gallery from Ottoman era.
The courtyard of the holy mosque where visitors circumambulate is covered with marble.
The same Saturday, Mecca
How strenuous was endeavor (Al-Saai) between Safa and Marwa! It would take you to 1400 years back! Or to 10000 years back!! Running and falling down under visitors’ feet, while wheelchairs are moving and people assume self-renunciation! Would this great gathering mean that a single individual loses himself among the crowd? This crowd might consist of 10000 or 20000 individuals doing the same job at one time!
Do you can be your self in this great self-renunciation and perform your duty alone?
The pressure and struggling from everybody shall force you to go to the direction that the crowd wants you to be! All calculations here shall be lost! There would be no meaning for individualism! What is the difference between 2000 and 10000? Yemenis are there with their dirtiness and unkempt hair and hollow eyes and the ropes tightened to their wastes!
Negroes are different; some of them tall while others are well-built bodies!
They move with all their bodies and wouldn’t care of other visitors, ladies are moving here and there holding their slippers as if they have been lost in the desert! It seems they are not human beings to attend Hajj rituals, at the time when everybody was ready to help them. Here is a vivid youth pushing everybody in his way and paving the way for himself and laughing as if he is in a crowded market!
Another old man is being pushed by the crowd and being forced to move to the front. I was convinced that I wouldn’t tolerate seeing his body under the crowd’s feet! I extended my hand to him and asked him to sit and relax in the endeavor (Al-Saai), to be in safe from visitors in their endeavor between Safa and Marwa. At the end of that chaos you shall find self-renunciation at Marwa which is higher than the corridor, you must turn around and return to the place you came from.
Whenever Yemenis reach the end of endeavor (Al-Saai) they jump and turn around then they point at the holy Kaaba, then they repeat the attempt, there I discovered my weakness and cried then I decided to ran away!
During circumambulation around the holy Kaaba, you rotate shoulder to shoulder with other visitors, you start from a specified point then you come to that point at the end! Which means there are order and target existing!!
You are an atom rotating around the center, so you are connected and tied to something, you are not free! The most important thing there is that there would be no confrontation, you rotate shoulder to shoulder, in Al-Saai (endeavor) you start and return to the point you have started with! The same as Hajar, mother of Ishmael (pbuh) did, she didn’t have a specified target.
What you would face is the continuation of confronting different eyes!
A pilgrim who endeavors is equivalent to two feet running! And a pair of eyes that don’t see anything but running away for themselves!
There are no eyes there except dissolute consciences, or consciences sitting at the threshold of eyes waiting orders to run away! Do you think you would be able to look at those eyes even for a second? Up to that day I thought I wouldn’t be able to look at the sun only! But today I discovered the difficulty in looking to the sea of these eyes also!! So I run away after two rounds in Al-Saai (endeavor).
Simply, you discover that you are a zero that is being used in adding to infinity! This phenomenon occurs when you are optimistic, so you feel that you have just started! Otherwise you shall find yourself before that end less than a zero! Either you shall look like a straw on sea’s water, or in a sea of human beings or more than that in the air!
Frankly, I found myself getting crazy to the extent that I wanted to hit my head at the first pillar made of cement; you must be blind if you decided to perform Al-Saai (endeavor)!
When you leave Al-Saai you shall find a market connected to that place, I hid myself behind Al-Saai’s wall in order to quench my thirst by a bottle of coca cola; while I was there I kept thinking of something I read for a western writer about “adding” and “individualism”.
Sunday, the ninetieth of April 1964, Mecca
This morning I went to visit Abu Taleb’s grave; it is located above Amer’s mountain pass, at the stretch of the new cemetery in Mecca, there was no trace for that northern valley! What a surprise, Saudis have destroyed every thing without keeping any trace of them!! There, at the other side, there is Bakea cemetery, here and there; there are some pieces of graved marble, you can recognize neither a place nor anything else!!!
Monday, twentieth of April 1964, Mecca
We suppose to go to Arafat at six or seven o’clock. From this moment an active movement erupted in the room, everybody was in hurry; everyone was tiding ropes and then untying it, which caused some pilgrims to forget how to put on Ihram garment!
Tuesday, the twenty one of April 1964
Arafat is a plain small desert surrounded by mountains from three sides, it is located on Taef road, the area is a little higher than its surroundings and its weather is colder than near areas. From early morning pilgrims resorted to offering their sacrifices, most of Bedouins and Yemenis hang torn-off limps beside their tents either to flay them or to emptying their intestinal.
Wednesday, the twenty second of April 1964
Yesterday afternoon visitors started heading for Mina on feet, last night was the most difficult part of Hajj journey, from nine till ten and thirty o’clock we were walking under severe cold weather and rough ground while we were wearing Ihram garment, ladies remained in the buses, where men went to the versant of the mountain to collect pebbles. Our colleagues collected pebbles in the darkness using torches, preparing themselves to throw at Satan next morning.
At last moments of that dark night it wasn’t cold weather or tiredness or even coughing that annoyed me, but it was the shine of one year and its attraction that would force me to think deeply at such a night till dawn, exactly as that old lady who wiped in front her house’s door for forty days waiting for Prophet Khither (pbuh), but she couldn’t recognize him!
She didn’t recognize Khither at the last day, at that moment I was so exhausted from cold weather and insomnia that I didn’t want to stand in order to look in my inside where the friend and the alien united!
Boundaries are not specified, and interference of that narrow straight which dubbed “Masher Al-Hiram” with the humanity and bestial feelings!
While I was lying on my back I was asking myself: wasn’t that invitation for this reason in particular? Didn’t I accept the invitation for that purpose??
So what is the meaning of self-renunciation then???
The same day at the same location
We left Masher Al-Hiram at five o’clock in the morning; we crossed two kilometers only when the road was blocked! It took from us two hours to cross two kilometers only!! We had to pass a narrow straight while everyone was in hurry. I disembarked from the truck; I knew the location of Shies pilgrims’ tents.
As far as Mina is concerned, it is a valley surrounded by several mountains and at the center of it there is a ravine which branches reach near valleys. And there are simple buildings and shops on the both sides of the road in addition to Khaif mosque. At the end of the valley there is a narrow straight leads to Mecca.
Behind the buildings on both sides of the road, there is an especial place designated for pilgrims’ tents. The first Satan was near police station, the place was so crowded with tall and short individuals, and a hill of pebbles which were thrown at Satan! As for slaughterhouse, it is a vast area surrounded by a fence and has two doors, its ground is totally covered by animals’ corpses, such as sheep, goats and camels, but you wouldn’t see camels among them!
Next Friday, Mecca
Once more we prepared ourselves for moving from Mina to Mecca, the distance between two places is not far but due to road closure it takes some hours to reach Mecca, going to Mina and Arafat and returning from there is a splendid movement, I wish it would be done without vehicles, officials must designate a specified time at the end of afternoon to mobilize all visitors on foot, in this way weak and sick people could be sent in vehicles. That distance could be crossed on foot, vehicles should be omitted from this religious path, and this target could be achieved through transforming the two holy cities in to two international cities!
Saturday, the twenty fifth of April 1964
After our arrival yesterday afternoon, I took a shower and headed for the holy mosque in Mecca, I performed circumambulation (Tawaf) and its prayer, then I performed endeavor between Safa and Marwa, for a while I sat down in the holy mosque watching visitors while they were circumambulating around holy Kaaba and how they were too close to each other and everybody is worried about others!
Sunday, the twenty six of April 1964, Mecca
Still no news regarding departure! Though we accomplished Hajj rituals we had to wait for Saudi government’s permission to leave. According to last years procedures, Egyptian pilgrims would be the first group to obtain leave permission, I couldn’t trace the Egyptians; it seems for me that we would stay here till Eid of Ghadier.
Tuesday, the twenty eight of April 1964, Mecca
We were notified to move at 02 A.M.
Wednesday, the twenty nine of April 1964, Mecca
This afternoon I went for the last time to visit the holy mosque, a visit? No! Not for farewell! Saying farewell to almighty God or his house?
Thursday, the thirteen of April 1964, Jeddah city
We were prepared to travel to Jeddah city from ten o’clock last night, but we moved at 01:45 A.M in order to cross a distance not more than thirty six miles, we arrived at Jeddah airport at 04:30 A.M. here we are at a courtyard in front of the airport, we covered the ground with blankets at our disposal near our bags as thousands of pilgrims did, waiting for take off.
Two o’clock afternoon from the same day
Jeddah city
Those last hours are the worse ones! At 06:15 P.M we handed over our bags to the custom and we are still waiting!
At 10:15 P.M we were at the stairs of the plane. 11P.M, we were inside the plane, it was a B.U.B plane with for engines.
What I learned from this trip that it was out of curiosity not hope! Any way it was an experience and a little adventure! All these simple experiences without adventures, even though they are normal experiences, but they are the essential foundation for a kind of awareness! But awareness is at least a kind of suspicion!!
Therefore, I’m breaking up stairs of certainty due to the pressure of continued experiences, one by one!
By the way, what would be the outcome of life? I remembered later what
“Bolnizar” wrote in his book “the Saudi’s Eden” that a human being is not a pair of eyes only! It became clear for me that a human being is a blend of a environmental and cultural factors, with limited qualities and limited occasions also! What so ever the case is, a human being is not a mirror only, but a mirror that some specified things reflex in it!!
Hajj voyage is a Sunna (religious tradition) that invites a million individual every year to gather in an especial place and encourages them to perform specified rituals, therefore we must stop at the differences and variables since the time of Nasser Khosrow till our present day!
My last word, would that be a confession, an objection or atheism or whatever you like to call it and accept it?
The more thing I was looking for in that trip was the whereabouts of my brother’s grave, and other brothers in faith, God is always available and handy for those who believe in him!!!
